We’ve all heard it a million times: “Networking is the best way to find a job” or “70 to 80 percent of people find their jobs through networking.” But in the last five years, networking has gotten a bad reputation. During the downturn, with so many good people out of work, networking was at a fevered pitch. And, because so many people don't know how to network, those who were being “networked,” became burned out on the concept.

So, how do you break through? By understanding yourself, being better prepared, and by having something to offer in return.

What Is Networking?

Here is one definition of networking from the Merriam Webster dictionary: “the exchange of information or services among individuals, groups, or institutions; specifically the cultivation of productive relationships for employment or business.” Note the use of the word exchange, which is defined as “the act of giving one thing in return for another.” So, one of the first rules of networking: It is a two-way street. You need to be constantly thinking about what you can do for the people with whom you wish to network. During a recent ATD webcast, “Stand Out: Networking,” presenter Dorie Clark said that one of her pet peeves was when people say, “I’d like to pick your brain,” because it sounds like a one-way extraction of information.

So, before you ask someone for a networking meeting, think about the WIIFM (what’s in it for me) for the other person. You may have information or contacts that are useful to them. You may be able to provide them with publicity, visibility, or help with a volunteer project. The possibilities are endless, so be alert for what you will be able to offer in exchange for their help.

How Do I Network?

Networking is not scary. We do it all the time. If you’re looking for a new doctor or a plumber, you might ask a friend or neighbor for recommendations. These days, you might look it up online, but you’ll want to see reviews, which are just another form of networking via online crowd-sourced recommendations. This brings me to my second rule of networking: People hire people. Computers don’t hire people. When people need to hire a new employee, they would much rather hire someone who has been referred to them by a trusted source, than by taking their chances with an unknown quantity.

Consequently, if you are looking for a position, it’s important to let lots of people know that you are available and what you are looking for. That way, if they hear about something, they will think of you—especially if you have impressed them and found ways to help them (see rule # 1).

This leads to the third rule of networking: You are not really networking until you are talking to people you don’t know. Most people do not start getting results from networking until they have expanded beyond their inner circle of friends, neighbors, and colleagues to their third layer of contacts, which comprises friends of friends of friends.

This is because it’s unlikely that your friends will happen to know the person who is hiring at a particular company you may be interested in. However, they might know someone who works at that company, who might know the hiring manager. More likely, they might know someone who knows someone who works at that company. You get the idea.

How do you approach someone you don’t know? To answer this question, I refer you to the blog post, “How to Ask for a Networking Meeting.”

For more information on networking, see Part II of this series on networking next week as well as the latest TD at Work collection on Career Management.