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Learning from Carnegie: Strawberry vs. Worm

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Wed Sep 14 2011

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In 1936, Dale Carnegie published the bestselling How to Win Friends and Influence People. The book has been a massive success and remains a popular resource today for those looking to succeed in both personal and professional endeavors. One of Carnegie's fundamental techniques inworking with people was to arouse in the other person an eager want.

My Father employed this very technique when I was in the 9th grade. He wanted me to read Carnegie's book, but what arouses that kind of eager want in a teenager? He used a rather persuasive argument and I happily read the whole thing.

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Carnegie, contemplating this idea of creating "an eager want" in others, had an enlightening experience and explains, "I often went fishing up in Maine during the summer. Personally, I am very fond of strawberries and cream, but I have found that for some strange reason, fish prefer worms. So when I went fishing, I didn't think about what I wanted. I thought about what they wanted. I didn't bait the hook with strawberries and cream. Rather, I dangled a worm or grasshopper in front of the fish and said: "Wouldn't you like to have that?" Why not use the same common sense when fishing for people?"

There's something to be said for fishing with the right materials. Strawberries and cream would have been awfully difficult to get onto that hook. But, if strawberries and cream are your only bait and fish are your only audience, then it's time to get a little creative. If you're anything like me, you've already thought of several ("creative"okay, absurd) ways to make it work.

However, if you have worms, use worms. Besides, even if you manage to get one of those pureed strawberries and cream ice cubes to last on the hook, those fish still prefer worms. Why make it harder than it needs to be? Find what works for your audience, use those resources to the best of your ability, and watch the fish bite.

In his book Influencing Human Behavior, Henry A. Overstreet comments, "Actions springs out of what we fundamentally desireand the best piece of advice which can be given to would-be persuaders, whether in business, in the home, in school, in politics is: First, arouse in the other person an eager want. He who can do this has the whole world with him. He who cannot walks a lonely way."

What are your 'strawberries and cream'? What are your 'worms'? Who are your 'fish' and what are you doing to get them hooked?

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And, if you're curious what motivates a teenager to read something other than the TV guide, try cash.

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