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Karin Hurt and David Dye, CEO and President of Let’s Grow Leaders, join the podcast to discuss their newly released book, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Workplace Conflict: What to Say Next to De-stress the Workday, Build Collaboration, and Calm...

Embrace Constructive Conflict with Karin Hurt and David Dye

In this episode of ATD's , we're talking about workplace conflict, something we have been experiencing for as long as there have been workplaces. Karin Hurt and David Dye, culture and communication experts and CEO and President of , explain what's new...

Podcast: How to Handle Workplace Conflict with Karin Hurt and David Dye

In this episode of ATD's Talent Development Leader podcast, we're talking about workplace conflict, something we have been experiencing for as long as there have been workplaces. Karin Hurt and David Dye, culture and communication experts and CEO and President of Let's Grow Leaders (https://letsgrowleaders.com/), explain what's new about workplace conflict today. They share findings from their current global research project, the World Workplace Conflict and Collaboration Survey, and explain practical solutions that TD leaders can use to create positive outcomes from conflict.

How to Handle Workplace Conflict with Karin Hurt and David Dye

In this first of two posts on enhancing your relationship with the boss, I interviewed the author of the new book, Overcoming an Imperfect Boss, Karin Hurt, CEO of Let's Grow Leaders. Karin is an experienced executive, speaker and writer with a diverse background in sales, marketing, customer service, merger integration, human resources, training and leadership development. She has put her 20 years of leadership experience at Verizon to very good use. Over the past year, she’s launched a consulting business and award-winning blog. And she’s written her first book, Overcoming an Imperfect Boss, an interactive working guide for navigating today’s business landscape and getting what you need from a (perfect or imperfect) boss.I recently had the chance to explore with Karin some of the concepts from her book.I really appreciated your comment in the book that “beginning in the space of imperfection offers much freedom and power.” What exactly do you mean by this?When you realize your boss is just a human being doing the best she can, just like you, it inspires you to take more ownership for your career. It’s not your boss’ job to motivate you, develop you, or direct your career. That’s your job. Recognizing imperfection empowers you to stop waiting for her to change or to help you, and to find the support you need. It’s also important to recognize that your boss needs your support. Seeing her as human inspires deeper empathy to create more meaningful and supportive connection. Stronger relationships lead to better business results and growth for both of you.Have you learned more from good or bad bosses? Which do you think are more powerful teachers for most people?Bad, hands down. If we can get past the frustration and allow the learning to seep in, bad boss behavior teaches us what not to do at a deep emotional level. We are more empathetic to the impact we’re having on others.  Also, paying attention to your reaction teaches you to manage your own emotions and stress. Despite the title, your book hits on nearly every relationship employees have: the boss, executives, peers. Which do employees struggle with most and why?My experience is that peer relationships can be the toughest for many folks, particularly early in their career. There’s often a sense of competition where there should be collaboration. Traditional stack-ranked systems can aggravate this behavior.   Throughout the book, you outline scenarios and followed them up with solutions; but you took a different tack with your discussion of the disengaged boss. Rather than offering tips to improve the situation, you explore the benefits of it. Why?Before you can take action, you’ve got to get your head in the right place. It’s tempting to think, “Well, if my boss doesn’t care than neither do I,” or “Poor me…. I wish I had a great boss like Joe.” Instead seize the benefits of this great opportunity: freedom to experiment, strategic thinking, teambuilding, a broadened network. What are the special challenges of engaging with a boss – perfect or imperfect – in today’s increasingly virtual environment?  And what advise do you have to employees of bosses who are both imperfect and remote?I have been working in long distance leadership situations for almost two decades. I have led many highly dispersed teams.  For most of my career I have not worked in the same state as my boss. And in my last role I led a team dispersed over 20 states across three time zones.My advice: Understand that every interaction counts. Stay well organized and prepare good updates, followed-up by email summaries. Explore ways to connect “eye to eye” through technology. Keep track of your accomplishments—it’s not bragging it’s helpful, particularly in a remote environment. Take time to get to know one another as people. It’s a bit harder in a virtual environment, but worth the effort.

A Q&A with Karin Hurt: Overcoming an Imperfect Boss

Karin Hurt helps human-centered leaders find clarity in uncertainty, drive innovation, and achieve breakthrough results. She’s the founder and CEO of Let’s Grow Leaders, a global leadership development and training firm known for practical tools and leadership development programs that stick.She’s the award-winning author of five books including Courageous Cultures: How to Build Teams of Micro-Innovators, Problem Solvers, and Customer Advocates and Powerful Phrases for Dealing With Workplace Conflict and a hosts the popular Asking for a Friend Vlog on LinkedIn. A former Verizon Wireless executive, Karin was named to Inc. Magazine’s list of great leadership speakers.Karin and her husband and business partner, David Dye, are committed to their philanthropic initiative, Winning Wells – building clean water wells for the people of Cambodia.

Karin Hurt

June 2019 - TD Magazine

Employees’ fear of speaking up is detrimental to cultivating a culture of solution-focused problem solvers.

To Be Heard

April 2017 - TD Magazine

Learn the blueprint for turning around negative performance.

Use Feedback Scripts to Inspire Behavioral Change

He's smart, quick on his feet, and has power. All attempts to persuade him have failed. You could just give in—after all you've tried, and he is the boss. If he wants something a certain way, then fine.But, deep in your heart you know you're right. You care. It matters. Others are counting on you. Try again and PERSUADE him to your point of view.Of course, every boss is different. Understand and play to their style. I've had lots of bosses over the years, and am constantly being persuaded by those I lead.Here are eight time-tested approaches to consider.P - PrivateWhatever you do don't confront him in front of your peers, his peers, or the team. You get the picture. Take the discussion offline.E - EmotionLet your passion inspire your argument, but don't emote. Stay calm. Appeal to his heart and mind, but don't wear your heart on your sleeve. It might help to tell a story, but think it through first. Overly emotional appeals will weaken your argument.R - ResearchDo your homework. Prepare for questions. Do the math. Do more math. Do the math his way. Poke holes. If he doesn't like math, collect stories. Do more math—just in case.S - ShareShare your concern frankly. Speak your truth. Share why you are concerned for the business. Have several supporting points.U - UnderstandListen CAREFULLY. The boss has broader perspective and more context. Learn as much as you can. Hear him out completely and suspend judgment. Then listen some more.A - AcknowledgeAppreciate his point of view. He's likely not a jerk. He's got pressures too. Understand them. Learn all you can. Consider deeply.D - DataIf you're still convinced, bring on the data. Build graphs. Show correlations. Draw pictures. Find stories. Benchmark with the best.E - EngageEngage your supporting team. For me, this usually means finance. These folks are more reasonable than you think. Convince others to care about your point of view. Get a light murmur of whispers headed to support your cause in their own words.Your turn: How do you persuade the boss?

How to PERSUADE Your Boss

You've gone from skipping to work, to dragging your butt. Little annoyances mushroom in the dung of frustration.  Reasons vary:  a terrible boss, unrealistic expectations, downsizing pressures, stagnating gifts, or unrecognized contributions. You've considered quitting—but that's a bold move and another post.I've made a career out of re-engineering my own jobs.  There's joy-packed potential all around you.  Energizing possibilities abound, and it is possible to grab the happiness that lurks in your day job. Here’s how:Name your frustrationWrite down what's really ticking you off.  The big and the small stuff.  Use as much paper as needed, and get it all out. Then step away.Pick the biggiesFind a big red pen and cross off the annoyances—every job has them.  Next, determine the one or two game-changers.  Focus your energy on addressing those concerns. You know what must be done.  Listen to your heart.   If you weren't scared, where would you start?   Talk to a mentor or coach, and make a plan.  You are powerful.  Use your power to change your scenery.**Collect joy**Remember what you love.  Negative feelings overshadow joy.  Notice what makes you truly happy at work.  Certain tasks? Interactions? Challenges?  Write those down too.Forget humilityWrite down your best talents.  Not just the "work appropriate" ones.  One of my leaders has an amazing rock band.  I love to sing.  You'd be surprised how many opportunities you can find to sing "at work." Sure, in the long-run, confident humility is vital.  But you've got to acknowledge you gifts to have the courage to use them.**Create the job you want**Bring your passion to your job. My deep desire is growing leaders.  My job description says that I manage sales, marketing, customer service, outsourcing, and so on. But it does not say: "design and deliver unique leadership development programs for your team" or "mentor anyone that asks for help" or "spend your weekends writing an International blog to let your team in your head."   By investing deeply in those aspects of the job, I get through yawner finance meetings just fine.**Look for special projects**Before our leadership summit, a frontline leader asked if he could take a few pics and video throughout the two-day meeting.  Yesterday, my entire organization received a fully professional video that lit us all up.  It was an amazing investment of personal time and energy.  He took it upon himself to leverage his gifts to bring more joy beyond his role.  Bottom line: Skipping to work turns heads. How have you found more joy in your work? How could you?

6 Steps to Loving the Job You Hate

“Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.” —C.S. LewisI’m alarmed by the humility deficit in many leaders. Why do we reinforce, recognize, and promote the brazen and arrogant over the humble?  Why do we teach our teams to cater to executives as celebrities?I’m always in awe of the truly humble—those consistently making enormous sacrifices and deflecting the credit.  The most humble leaders are great spiritual teachers.But is humility teachable?  The short answer: Yes. Truly humble leaders don’t try to impress others with titles, credentials, or accomplishments.  They pull out the best in others. Or as Max Brown wrote in The Character-Based Leader, “Humility isn’t timidity or weakness.  It is confidence, wisdom, and grace combine with an acknowledgement that we are all imperfect.”Here are five ways to teach humility:1. Build confidence. Often what passes for arrogance is actually fear.  Some leaders attempt to “humble” other leaders or “put them in their place” through public criticism or embarrassment.  This tactic actually has the opposite impact.  We need leaders who are confident enough to not need to talk about it.2. Teach the art of great questions. Teach leaders to have the art of asking provocative questions: “What does the team think about this idea?” and “Who did you involve in this decision?” Also be sure to teach them the power of pause.  3. Get leaders out of their comfort zone. Give them a stretch assignment  or project in an area they know nothing about.  I can tell you from experience, nothing is more humbling than being clueless.  Put them in arenas where they must rely on their team or peers to be successful. 4. Give leaders tools. Give your leaders the tools they need to manage their blind spots. Start with employing a 360 assessment. Some leaders may need a coach.  Always encourage your team to surface and work through their own conflicts.5. Model behaviors. Bottom line: You must model the behavior you want to see in your leaders. Be a servant leader.Admit when you are wrong.Coach privately.Recognize, honor and reward humble behaviors on teams, as ironic as this sounds.  Minimize desire for folks to “toot their own horn” by tooting it for them.Reject special treatment, even when it’s convenient.  Live by the same rules and standards you expect your team to uphold.

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